


repetition

by aetherae



Category: Fate/stay night (Visual Novel)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-05
Updated: 2014-12-05
Packaged: 2018-02-28 06:24:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2722043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aetherae/pseuds/aetherae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When she thinks about it, it’s the same as it always is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	repetition

**Author's Note:**

> sakura (and rin, and shirou), set during the “superhero” bad end. i probably should’ve just picked one thing to focus on, but this week was stressful and i just wanted to unwind, so HERE IT IS.

Sakura wakes up.

She’s exhausted, both physically and mentally, and she shouldn’t even be able to open her eyes yet. It takes all her effort just to drag a ragged breath in, but still, she wakes up. She wakes up because she can feel it.

Someone wants to kill her.

Her heart pounds, and already she’s looking around the room, desperate to find a way to escape. It would be right, she knows, for her to die; she honestly agrees with the hostility she feels. It’s the correct choice no matter how she tries to justify herself. If she can’t stop herself from hurting people, from killing them, then there’s no other option. She’s left with such a simple truth, and yet she can’t accept it.

She’s scared.

The more she wants to live, the more she hates herself. In the end, she values herself more—the her that has nothing, no hope, and no future—than the innocent lives who are living their own happy lives. She disgusts herself, but she’d rather put up with her own self-hatred than be hurt again after being hurt for all her life.

Her body is exhausted, only panicked adrenaline fueling her will as she almost lifts her arm up, when she hears them.

“So you won’t mind even if I kill Sakura?” Rin asks someone, her tone the same as always—cold, distant, perfect. Even when speaking of something like dirtying her hands with blood, her older sister still sounds like an admirable, beautiful jewel, as if her heart was made of the gems she used in magecraft.

Of course it’s her hostility that she feels, that woke her up when it shouldn’t have even been possible. Her sister, with everything good someone could possibly have, naturally has perfect judgment as well. She’s making the right choice, and Sakura grinds her teeth without realizing it.

“I have nothing to say. But———” a familiar voice says. The girl holds her breath. “If I can take your place, I will.”

And she lets it out, like letting go of a burden.

Despite her exhaustion, she feels refreshed, and as she lies alone on that cold, stone table, she smiles. This is the natural course of action for someone like him, and somewhere in her heart, she thinks that she expected it—and that’s okay. If it’s his decision, then she’ll stand by it as well. She knows that Rin won’t give this to him, but it’s alright. For a person like her, being killed by the person she loves is too much to ask for.

When her sister comes into the room, she looks surprised to see her awake, guilty almost, but it’s quickly covered by the same composed expression she always has. Sakura greets her similarly.

“Sakura, I’m going to kill you. You know that, right?”

“I know,” she says, her voice a flat, somber sound. It’s not a tone her Senpai would recognize, but she thinks her sister knows it well enough by now. In a way, this really is for the best; selfishly, she hopes that the image she had in the Emiya household will be the one that Shirou remembers most. “Please tell Senpai that this was the right decision, and… And goodbye.”

Rin nods, and Sakura closes her eyes. Her heart feels like ice, and she doesn’t even tremble as the other girl approaches. It’s the same story as always, really—Rin, calm as she does what must, and Sakura, accepting what happens to her no matter what it is. At that moment, she thinks it’s right for her sister to be the one to do this.

After all, she’s taken so much from her already. What does it matter if she takes her life too?


End file.
